If you're around the IWC every show, like myself, it's sometimes easy to forget how confusing things can be around here. I was at the studio the other day giving some friends of mine an opinion on a new single they've been working on, when one of them (I hate dropping names, so I'll just call him "Method Man") says to me "MZA," (that's what they call me, the MZA) "what is the dealyo with the craziness in that wrestling place you're always going down to in P-burgh, yo?"

As I sat down and explained to Method I realized that maybe it would make sense to clue the fans in every once in a while on what's going on too.

First up we have IWC's problem child, Jesse Vendetta. He's taking on Jimmy "Deeelicious" DeMarco. I'm torn on Vendetta. On one hand, you have to acknowledge the kid has a point. He's been overlooked like some kind of side show freak for the better part of a year now. On the other hand, I really was looking forward to seeing him wrestle as the Goon. You have to give this one to DeMarco. Partly for experience and partly because Vendetta needs to be taught a lesson for fronting on the Goon. The Goon rocked.

Next up we have Ciglar and Cage vs. Ray Rowe and the Big Daddy of Destruction, J-Rocc (Give it up one time!). It's the same old story you hear time after time around these parts. It's the same old story, two good for nothing bullies from Pittsburgh picking on a couple of nice guys from Cleveland who were minding their own business. If there's any justice in the world Rocc and Rowe will do their city proud and take this one. Rocc and Rowe™. You saw it here first folks. If they use that name, I want royalties.

This brings us to Gory and Kudo vs. Larry Sweeney and a partner of his choosing. You know what's wrong with this match? There's no one in it that doesn't hate Gory. Gory and Sweeney have been tearing each other apart for months, right? But in case anyone has forgotten, the last time we saw Kudo in the United States, he was dropping Gory on his head and stomping on his chest. Way to pick a partner there. Ah well, mimes aren't known for their intelligence. Sure, we don't know who Sweeney is going to pick. It could be another former great ICW/ICWA champion (you have my number, Larry) or it could be King Kong Bundy. Who knows. Still, I have to give this one to the champ.

Will and Heywood, the Jablome Brothers Moving Company are set to defend their titles against a surprise team. One can only hope they are finally defeated by whoever steps up to the plate to face them.

Fabulous vs. Lo-Ki. Ok, this just doesn't make any sense. True story, I was hit by a car once, when I was a kid. I was lucky. I got up and walked away. I went to the hospital, got checked out, and I was fine. I DID NOT CHALLENGE THE CAR TO ANOTHER $%@!^&# MATCH!. McChesney is clearly an idiot here, and will be lucky to escape with his life.

All four members of the Unholy Alliance (Shirley Doe, Abyss, HENTAI, and Sebastian Dark) face members of Team IWC (Sterling James Keenan, Dennis Gregory, Jon Bolen and Dean Radford) in singles competition. I for one am sick of these crybabies. Here's hoping that Team IWC sends these numbskulls home for good. As an added bonus, SJK, it's been too long since you had some gold accessorizing. It suits you.

And that leaves us with the one most important match. Crybaby Troy Lords vs. my best friend, Shiima Xion. This match shouldn't even be here. Can someone please explain to me why Troy Lords, whose biggest accomplishment in IWC history was being substitute tag champion is being given a Super Indy bid ahead of the only 2-time winner of the Rookie of the Year award? It's a conspiracy, I tell you. Everyone is always trying to keep the Filipino man down! No matter, Shiima should be defeating Troy in about 10 seconds flat, if I have anything to do with it.

And I usually do.
-The MZA